A few days ago, one of my friends on facebook posted this in her notes. It randomly showed up on my wall, and I wrote to this wise high school girl and told her how much I learned from it.
"A woman who has been transformed by the selfless love of Christ is not easily angered. She does not fly off the handle. She is not a slave to tumultuous emotions. She is not concerned with protecting her right to be treated a certain way. She is far more interested in the eternal souls of those around her than her own feelings.
As women, we've often been trained to believe that we are slaves to our emotions; that we can't help it when our feelings overcome us; controlling what we say and how we act. But contrary to popular belief, our outbursts of anger, tears of self-pity, overwhelming feelings of hurt, even hormonal ups and downs, can be conquered by God's Spirit overtaking our inner being. His love and life is far more powerful than our most intense emotions. And we are not to be controlled by anything but His Spirit."
--Leslie Ludy
The same day, one of my women friends posted the following as her status on facebook. It was one of those copy and paste dare statuses.
"I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."
--Marilyn Monroe
The fact that these two contradictory posts appeared on my feed the same day intrigued me. I probably wouldn't have remembered them had they not. One struck me in such a positive way, and one simply made me think--but not about goodness.
I have a sense of humor. I'm an advocate for women, though I don't necessarily peg myself as a feminist. But, I am disturbed by the need for women to celebrate themselves as divas, bitches, or as being high-maintenance. I can't think of any less empowering monikers, yet women use them proudly.
I do not fit the first womanly description, but I'd like to one day. Such freedom, it's something to strive for, to pray for. I certainly don't fit Marilyn's description, and it's something to avoid. Being handled? It sounds like allowing a man to manipulate me. When I commented similarly on the facebook post, another one of her friends who does not know me told me to "lighten up." I had to laugh. If anything, getting to know God has done just that to me, lightened me up. I'm more forgiving, more focused, more able to give up control, blessed with perspective, and able to give up hurts more quickly (not immediately, I am after all a work in progress) than I was before.
I am willful, but it's a different will I bend to now.
Prepare to be underwhelmed.
I met a man so nice, I married him twice!
4 comments:
ummmmm wow. that's some thoughtful stuff.
as for the "lighten up" comment… that is the post-modern world for you. you can blather on and on about what you feel, what you think, even if it's total b.s. but don't go dragging God into it.
{sigh}
the loving God and loving others thing is an equal-opportunity call. and to think one sex is better suited for it over another is misguided and a cop-out. women i think are generally more "wired" for that and so maybe feel the responsibility more? but in the middle of pouring out we often feel empty and "needy." (i know i do)
but instead of stopping there, and sitting mired in our needy-ness, that's the time when we need to fill up on the Holy Spirit. (so yeah, there's the God-quotient) to be an effective lover of others, a giver, an encourager, a mentor… whatever, takes a lot of energy and resources. filling up is really not optional, it's a necessity.
all that said, it really is about losing oneself.
it's about submitting. to God's authority, to the authority of the leader of our households; yet not to our own emotions. in other words, we cannot let our emotions get the upper hand and dictate the way we act.
i think "being hormonal" is just a cheap excuse to gloss over our bad behavior and flat-out sin. it's self-indulgent and contrary to Christ-like behavior.
the first example you quoted was really 1 cor 13.
and if i could really capture that deep within my soul, what an impact that would make for the kingdom.
sadly, i'm still the center of my own universe.
i know i've rambled aimlessly and completely posted a blog post in your comments, but i thought today's post was very thought provoking and well written.
you should be a teacher or something.
and you'll have to forgive me for posting as my brother (which he will probably not know). i'm helping him with his blog and was on his profile. note to self: sign off.
As always, very well said, Ellen. Great contrast of the quotes. I too have never understood the diva celebration - there are so many other positive things for women to strive for...
BTW dear comment readers,
Bobaloo is, in this case, my friend Kimberly.
Too funny...
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